If you want to affect change, you have to change access to the stories heard.

I'm a member of a Women's Entrepreneur group in Lansing, Michigan. Yesterday, we had Brian Calley, the President of the Small Business Association of Michigan, speak with our group. One of the things Brian spoke about was the importance of small business owners having discussions and relationships with their local legislators. Because how else will your representatives know how the decisions they make will actually affect you if you don't let them know?

And it got me to thinking about something a trainer told me during a training I went to recently on effective facilitation of difficult conversations. They said, "If you want to change a culture, you have to change access to the stories heard."

Now, if I modify that a tiny bit - "If you want to affect change, you have to change access to the stories heard."

Studies have shown that one of the most effective ways to get people to retain information is to tell a story. (A study from Stanford showed that stories are remembered up to 22 times more than facts alone.) So if I tell someone a story about my business/life/journey, they are way more likely to remember it then if I just tell them some fact about my business/life/journey.

Here's a great example. Let's say I want to affect change in my community on how women who own construction companies are often treated by older, male customers. If you and I had a chat and you asked me what it's like as a female working on construction, which of the following statements from me are you more likely to remember?

"Well, I do sometimes face discrimination from some of my older, male customers. They might mean well and not realize it, but I've heard lots of comments that can be pretty demoralizing. And I know I'm not the only one - I've had conversations with other women who work in construction who say the same thing. It's really draining and definitely takes the wind out of my sails when it happens."

---

"I remember when I was in my mid-30s and was meeting with a very nice, older gentleman. He and I were walking over his driveway and talking about my recommendations for maintaining his asphalt. It was a hot and humid afternoon and I had come straight from working with the crew on a job site. I was super sweaty, my clothes had some asphalt and tar stains on them and you could tell I had been working outside for most of the day. He looked at me as we were finishing up our appointment and said 'Honey, really, you shouldn't be out here in this heat working so hard. You need to be spending your days back in your office in the air conditioning, putting your feet up on the desk and worrying about having babies.' I remember how my heart started beating really fast and I could feel my face start to flush - I was so pissed off. He would never think to tell a man they should be working in the office!"

I'd wager a guess that a year from now, regardless of how you actually felt about either statement, you'll be a lot more likely to remember the second statement. By me sharing an actual story about a specific incident and how it made me feel, your brain is more likely to call up and remember that conversation in the future. Maybe you would disagree that the comment that man made was actually harmful to me, and that I should get thicker skin. But maybe you'd also remember that comment the next time your elderly father made a similar comment and it would prompt you to have a discussion with him about his beliefs (or at least how he shares those beliefs with others).

So if you are trying to affect change, whether it's with customers or employees or peers or politicians or friends or partners or even strangers - remember that it's easier for them to remember your conversation and point of view if you share it in the form of a story. Even if they disagree with you, you've now utilized brain science to give you the best opportunity to have them actually remember what you're saying!